Looking back, the entire birth went about as well as possible, and even though it would certainly be called an easy labor, I think much of the smoothness and calm was due to your presence. I keep thinking of several things in particular:
First of all, I have to say that
I have rarely been so glad to see
anyone as to see you at the foot of my bathtub at 4:30 in the morning
as the contractions were escalating much faster than we had expected! You
stepped right over and started guiding my breathwork and--though Jason had
been doing great--I felt instantly that this was within the range of normal
and it was going to be OK.
Second, you handled my wavering
on the drugs issue perfectly--as you remember, I had a strong preference for
a drug-free birth, but when we arrived at the hospital with transition-like
contractions and
discovered I was 5cm, I got worried and started to reconsider. Based on the
way I said it ("Betsy, I think I might need something to help, this is
pretty hard") you gave me the perfect response ("Sure thing, we're
here to support you in whatever you need, but since I know you felt pretty
strongly that you didn't want to do that, would you be open to trying the
hot tub first? I think you're at a stage where that would really help.")
I felt reassured that I could choose whatever I needed to, but also that you
were there with your bag of tricks to help me follow my intentions as long
as I could (and of course it turned out that I actually was entering transition,
so that I was complete in less than an hour from that conversation, with no
drugs at all) :-)
Also, when my water suddenly broke as I came complete and it became apparent that there was meconium and it would be best if the birth happened quickly, I remember you calmly offering to the midwife to coach me with directed pushing--and then doing so very clearly and respectfully, without resorting to the "count to ten and turn purple" technique. That was great!
And of course, the many many emails we exchanged as I went through the last couple months of pregnancy-induced hypertension and the constant watch for pre-eclampsia. It was always calming and comforting to hear your perspective, and to get your extra, non-medical suggestions for how to keep the pressure in check.
It all came out fantastically--you
are really good at what you do, and
I now recommend doula care, and your name specifically, to every
expectant friend.
